Sunday. Day of rest, and day to organize the next week ahead. I am beat.

Julia's 1st birthday party at the science museum went over pretty well. Some minor disappointments and difficulties but I think the families will get used to celebrating in this new way -- with family activities being the focus rather than junk food and gifts.

If Paul and I don't start revising and updating the family traditions with #1, it will never get done. So the first Christmas and now the first birthday have been a challenge.

We asked for a story to take the place of gift opening at her party and we'll send polaroids of her opening at home with the thank you cards. I know the in-laws were a bit disappointed but the other cousins do it at their parties and they can enjoy it there. I rather preserve one of the few Chiense customs we can actually do and NOT do the gifts at a party. (With Julia being tri-ethnic it's hard to pick and choose which customs to keep and which to skip.)

My in-laws were a little surprised that we didn't allow Julia to have bakery sheet cake or ice-cream but didn't make a thing of it like my parents did. They're used to my monitoring her food closely and leave it to me. My mom? She ALWAYS wants to feed people. It's one of the ways she shows her love for them. So with her it's been a struggle with the baby's eating. She doesn't understand why she can't have everythign all willy nilly and she doesn't understand that it messes with my milk supply.

I hate it when they backseat parent though. It's ok if they are curious about why we do the things we do with Julia and want to ask but why they have to do it in front of the kid is beyond me.Sooo annoying.

I need their help in teaching her that what Mom or Dad say goes. No backtalk or questions and it doesn't help if the grandparents resist us in front of her. When she's older she can have more of a voice in what goes on but at 1 year old? She needs to mind us absolutely. If I say "stop!" you stop whether or not there is a car coming. If I say "No touch" you don't, whether it's the stove or the DVDs.

I need to work with them on discretion in front of the child.

And for the record -- a child's 1st party is NOT the time to be trying new foods, esp. ones with cow milk, eggs, wheat, chocolate and food colorings. All things that are high on the list of allergenic/reactive foods. If the child gets sick from it, it pretty much ruins the party. After considering all that and the massive sugar dose, we opted to bring Julia a vegan pumpkin cupcake from home and we tested her on it earlier in the week to make sure it would sit ok with her. Getting her a vegan cake was unfortunately not an option with the museum's catering service. So we did the best we could.

First time grandparents though. Sheesh. Hopefully by the time we have #2 they'll get a grip.